The fact that wizard law enforcement found a dude’s finger and immediately closed the investigation, declared him dead, and concluded that the only possible explanation for why they only found a finger was that he was killed so hard that the rest of him was obliterated kind of speaks volumes about why nobody followed up when the genocidal serial killer just vanished.
The Ministry of Magic is fucking useless.
not our division
when you wake up in the middle of the night thirsty as shit then go get some water and it tastes like jesus himself came down from heaven to cry wonderful distilled tears of joy into your cup
- you guys are allowed to send me messages
- you’re allowed to just say hi
- feel free to just tell me about your day as if we’ve been best friends since forever
- you’re all good to ask anything you want to know
- don’t be afraid to be off anon
- you can talk to me
- i like talking to you guys
- i dont bite
H. Jackson Brown, Jr. (via aestheticintrovert)
90% of my life is me making an irritated looking face
I love gordo because he never bitched about the friendzone. He was just a guy who happened to love his bestfriend, but he stayed a good, real, friend.
My reaction to finishing The Fault in Our Stars
One of the best jokes from Ratatouille - wine too expensive to spit out in disgust.
Baked some iPhone cookies to trick cops into pulling me over, then I just take a bite and ask if cookies are against the law.